When Saying No is a Great Big Yes

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

During the last few months while quarantining and social distancing…and basically just being at home a lot, I have done so many projects around the house. I’ve watched tons of movies (at least 8 Avengers movies, 11 James Bond movies, and introduced The Mayor to a ton of 80’s classics), and the amount of new recipes I’ve tried has been great. I’ve even made homemade pita! However, I still have done a lot of work on my business, written and posted to my blog, spent time (zoom time) with friends and family, done puzzles and read books. Aside from the fact that going places and doing things wasn’t really a possibility, it has made me think, why didn’t I do these things before the pandemic? I really like doing these things.

I started to think about what life looked like pre-pan and my one observation was that we were going, and going, all the time. When we were home I was exhausted. I would go to bed too late, but still get up early, eat too much quick food and take out, not drink enough water, and didn’t have enough time to keep the house to an acceptable level of order. The truth is, I don’t really miss all that!

There are a ton of things I do miss about the old normal, don’t get me wrong.  But there are a lot of things I don’t miss and this is what lead me to the intersection of saying yes and saying no. This is now where the work comes in – how do I continue on this path?

I am not at all sure what the rest of 2020 holds for us considering how the first half has gone. But what I do know is that going forward I want to try and do a better job of saying yes out of obligation or guilt. I want my yesses to be intentional. I want to say yes to the things that allow me to show up as my best self.

Things I’m going to say yes to:

  • Outdoor activities, even the ones that make me uncomfortable. I love how I feel after.
  • Drinks with friends…casual, spur of the moment drinks with friends.
  • Facetime or voice calls rather than text (I still like to text all the time, don’t get me wrong!).
  • Clothes that I feel comfortable in.

Things I’m going to say no to:

  • Guilt at sleeping in. I will probably never be a morning person, and I love to stay up late, so sleeping in a little is perfectly fine.
  • Plans to just have plans. Sometimes I just want to stay home and work on a house project.
  • Eating out when I have already made a dinner plan or just don’t feel like going out.
  • FOMO (fear of missing out). 

So as we continue to go back to whatever normal is going to be, if you hear me saying “no,” it’s not because I don’t care about you, and it doesn’t mean that I’m always going to give a hard no. I’m just going to try to care a little more about me. And…I’m going to encourage you to do the same for yourself.

What are some things that you would like to start saying no to? What are some things you want to be more intentional about?

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